Discipline Perspective

Well most of you know how thoroughly and consistently I taught and corrected Joshua when he was a baby. I don't remember a whole lot about Gray;s babyhood, but I imagine I was not quite as strict. And now that the boys are kids, when I see a baby hit another child and his mom look aghast and fuss at him, I think, "He doesn't even know what he's doing. Lighten up!" Even though I know I thought I was doing the right thing with Joshua, I guess I assume I am just wiser now, coming from the perspective of having two "big kids". I see my boys now having plenty of rebellious behavior that needs correction, but certainly they didn't do anything that was worth making a fuss about as babies, right? And my sweet little Julia just isn't capable of doing wrong on purpose, I reasoned, that is until yesterday...

I took her along with me while I provided transportation to the Burmese dad and his son to the eye doctor. I had thought this appointment would last about 30 minutes, maybe an hour when it was all said and done. I found out after waiting an hour and a half that it was a TWO to FOUR hour new patient exam. So anyway, during our 3 hours of waiting, I did a lot of walking Julia around the clinic. At one point, she jerked my hair. I told her firmly, "No," not because I thought she was trying to do wrong, but just to teach her that isn't okay. She stopped immediately and looked at me (I've seen her stop at "No" before, so I knew she was starting to understand it)...and then she jerked my hair again. I moved her hand and said, "No" again. She stared at me, said, "Nah!!" and did it again.

So now I realize that yes, it's important not to get too uptight about a baby's misbehavior, but yes, babies do misbehave and yes, they do need correction. Even when they are as cute and sweet as our little girl:)

Another Showing

We had our second showing today. It was very short notice. I think Matt called me at 10 and the people were coming at 12:30. Julia was waking from her nap, I still had a to-do list I was in the middle of, and the boys had been arguing all morning. There was no way I was up for thoroughly cleaning the house, taking care of the kids, and getting everyone lunch by noon-ish. But somehow it all happened and we were ready-even when they showed up at 12:15. I think they liked the house a lot, but they were a lot like the other couple that saw it...the wife was eerily similar to the other lady in every way, plus they have older kids and seem to have a house they need to sell first, though I'm not absolutely sure. The real estate agent that brought them by is actually a neighbor of ours that we'd never met. Anyway, who knows what--if anything--will come of this. They didn't even seem to know our asking price and hadn't seen the website, so I'm doubtful that it will pan out. Oh well, at least I got all my cleaning done early this week!

Long, but good day!

We have been really busy today....actually ever since yesterday when we ate an early supper and headed to the Hillsborough festival to hand out dessert and tell people about our church. The boys played hard as usual, Julia was a trooper, and we headed home hot, dirty, and tired. We got up early this morning and made our way over to the gym for the big fundraiser. It turned out really well with over 20 people working out (a few who had signed up didn't show, but a few unregistered folks ended up working out), about $1800 raised, and lots of spectators dropping by. Julia rode around in the front pack carrier on me for most of the time and even slept, but did so so well. The boys had fun playing with 2 other little girls and towards the end their cousins came too. We had an area roped off outside for them to play in and brought lots of stuff to keep them occupied. They were out there for 3 hours and did really well, but once again, we came home hot, dirty, and tired. We ate lunch, took a quick nap, and then headed out to the Duke/Army game (except Julia, who stayed with Nanny and Pa) with Stacy, who had tickets from work. The boys did really well again and had fun, though it was super hot. Joshua was pulling hard for Army and kept getting this smirk on his face when they would score, but a scowl if Duke did. Gray enjoyed waving to people, dancing, hiding cars, and licking things. We ate a quick supper afterwards, picked up Julia, and headed home...you guessed it!...hot, dirty, and tired! As for pictures of all this, I used Mama's disposable camera to take a couple at the game, so can't post those. The few you see here are from the gym and there are somewhere around 275 posted on facebook, if you're on that. Now to rest up for church!

Little pieces of our week

Not too much going on with us, but here are a few things that have happened this week:

Monday, I got to go to a Children's Ministry meeting with a few other ladies from church. We discussed several issues including changes that are coming in the next couple of months as our church gets ready to add a Sunday School hour. I always enjoy getting time with other adults, though Joshua was not happy that I wasn't there to sing "Jesus Loves Me" and he woke me up at 5 am to tell me so. I refused to sing and sent him back to bed and he was in quite a funk the next morning. We had a talk about not letting his need for routines cause him to do things that are rude or selfish and how the right thing to do would have been to wait till I got up and then ask me to sing. He did and I did and all was right with the world again!

Tuesday we made a trip to the gym so I could workout (but haven't been back since...maybe tomorrow!) and went to the library too, which we all enjoy. I got a book called "Like Dandelion Dust" by Karen Kingsbury and had finished reading it by the next afternoon. I was given a dvd on the making of the movie, which is coming out in the theaters soon, and it was fascinating to me so I was very excited to try the book. Now I want to see the movie for sure!

We did a little school a few days this week. One thing that has worked well with Joshua is for us to read a book about something, like an animal, and then I ask him questions about it. He writes down his one word answers and draws a picture. We learned about pandas one day and he told me that he liked learning about the babies the best and he was most proud of the panda that he drew. He's been doing a lot of drawing lately, which is something new for him.

The other night we were eating chicken burgers with blue cheese on them. I had told Joshua before that blue cheese was more of an adult taste when we had it in the past. This night, he held out a piece of it and declared, "I do not want this piece of adult cheese!" It made me laugh.

Gray has of course had his funny moments too. Today he asked me if he could hold Daddy's ear muscles. He meant ear muffs. Today I opened the car door for him and told him to get in his seat and buckle. I went to feed Pogo and came back to the car. Was Gray in his seat buckled? Of course not! He was standing up with his head half out the door licking the car. Yes, licking the car. Oh and yesterday he chewed up the spine of one of his books and left the remains on the floor. What am I going to do with him?

I enjoyed a solo shopping trip today to spend some birthday money and giftcards. Thankfully, God brought to my mind that blog I've written about before about the girl in Uganda taking care of all those needy people. The other night I checked it after not having read it for a month or so and found another amazing post, which changed my big plans to buy myself a bunch of clothes, so I didn't go too crazy, though with the full shopping cart I took into the dressing room, you would have thought I planned to buy out the store! Almost everything in Old Navy was on sale and there are so many options that it was quite overwhelming. I think I was in there for 2 hours! Anyway, time always goes by super fast when I'm going on an errand alone, but it was fun and I certainly couldn't have done it with the kids. Thanks, Cindy, for watching them.

The people that want to buy our house have been in touch and said they have their house on the market now, but haven't had interest, so who knows if that will ever happen. We're still praying!

Joshua and I made a few desserts today because our church is again participating in the Hillsborough Last Fridays festival, which is the last one this year. Looking forward to helping with that tomorrow and hoping it's not as hot and humid as last time!

We're also gearing up for a big fundraising workout at the gym on Saturday. I think there are about 25 people participating, plus some spectators, and they have raised about $1500 so far for some great charities. Crossfit affiliates all over the world will be holding this same event on Saturday so it's pretty cool that we get to have our own this year!

And last but not least, Miss Julia is keeping us on our toes. She can climb up the steps now...all the way if I'm behind her. She is crawling fast now and managing to find all sorts of things to taste, such as dirty shoes (of course Gray still regularly chews on his), buttons, papers, etc. One of her bottom teeth has finally come through just barely, with another close on its heels. She is calling me Mama and Matt Dada and we think she has said some other things like dog, night-night, bye-bye, though it's hard to tell at her age. She likes to read books and play hide toys/books. She's precious.

Well I hope everyone has a good weekend!

Tire Swingin

Matt put this up when we moved in, but the boys are just now enjoying it! We had a fun weekend with lots of outside time. Yesterday we spent all afternoon with Stacy and the cousins at Nanny's house, though Nanny and Pa were at the beach. Today we walked through the woods and played "running games" together in the back yard.

birthday pictures

Birthday

Thanks for everyone's birthday wishes and gifts yesterday and over the last week or 2! I had a good day yesterday. Most of it was pretty ordinary. There was cleaning, spanking, reading stories, changing diapers, laundry, fixing meals etc. But there were unusual moments too. I got a few presents from Matt--dish towels I had picked out and bought myself:) and some sweet treats. Matt made me a cookie cake (picture forthcoming!). I got to go use my Christmas gift certificate for a manicure and pedicure. We went to small group. I think my favorite moment of the day was my 30 minute drive to the spa. I was listening to some of my old favorite Christian music and thinking. There was a song about learning to be thankful even when you have no food or home. I was also thinking about something Matt and I had watched about Islam and wondering how in the world I'd ever handle being a Christian in an Islamic country. Sometimes I just feel so unworthy of God's love and attention because I have an easy life. I don't suffer for my faith or for anything. I don't want to go through anything hard and I'm very afraid of bad things happening to us. I am too absorbed in our normal family life and day to day stuff. I fall so short of Jesus's example. But then I heard this song by Nichole Nordeman called "I am." One of the verses in particular really spoke to me:

You saw me wear white, by pale candlelight,

I said forever to what lies ahead

two kids and a dream, with kids that can scream

too much it might seem when it’s 2 a.m.

When I am weak, unable to speak,
still I will call You by name.
“Oh Shepherd, Savior, Pasture-maker,
hold on to my hand,” and You say “I am.”

And I just felt God telling me that even though I fall short and even though I can often barely handle my simple, blessed life and just being a mother to these three children is overwhelming, he loves me and I'm important to him. His love makes me want to do more and be more like Jesus, but I know that I don't have to do anything for him to care for me. It's so hard to live like that and know it all the time, but yesterday for a moment it was very real to me and that was such a gift!

Now back to my chores and to 2 little boys saying, "Mommy, Mommy!" and a baby babbling in her crib. Mama and Daddy are spending the night with us tonight and we are all excited for company! Hope you have a good rest of the week!

Pictures from the weekend...

...are here: http://moorememoriesplease.blogspot.com/2010/09/whirlwind-trip.html

Our Little Stander-Upper and Step-Climber

Fort Mill Weekend

If you are one of the few people that reads this and isn't family, you may be wondering where I've been the last few days...the kids and I took a trip to FM for my grandmother's 80th bday party. We had a lot of fun and just got home today so I'm still in recovery mode...errands, clothes washing, cleaning, etc. Plus Julia's sleeping left a lot to be desired so I'm pretty tired.

Some of the highlights...sorry no pictures b/c Matt had the camera, but I'll link to Jeannie's blog when she posts some:

-Mama, Jeannie, and I had a fun time decorating mini-bday cakes for September bday people besides Grandmama

-the big party was a huge success; Grandmama got to do lots of walking down memory lane with a slideshow of her life and a trivia game; LOTS of family and friends filled her house and it was a little overwhelming for Julia (me too!), but good to see people...I just love being with our extended family; the boys had a great time with their cousins and my 8 year old cousin; Grandmama got a new kitten and Joshua was enamored...and allergic; Gray and Carly were big buddies and Carly announced that Gray was "in her heart"; Gray rode on the 4 wheeler a few times--Joshua refused; we ate a ton...like a constant stream of food entering our bodies from 3pm-8pm Yikes!

-the boys had a blast playing in the baby pools in the front yard on Sunday and got a special golf course tour on the golf cart with GrandGene on Friday

-Julia is saying her first word "Mama"--she says "Dada" too but don't think she knows what she's saying. It's fun to hear her call for me. She also stood alone for a few seconds. She crawled all over and loved seeing her cousin Sawyer and doggy friend Stuckey!

I'm sure there's something I'm missing but I'm a little fuzzy about it all right now. More later...

pictures- another Mimi made outfit and our little crawler

The Weekend

We definitely had an interesting weekend over Labor Day...nothing too crazy, but just different. Saturday we all went to a Durham park for the workout. The kids loved playing and lots of people came to participate in the workout, so it was good all around. Saturday night, Matt and I got to go to the NC State game (Thanks, Daddy) and it was a perfect night to spend outside watching our favorite team. Sunday we had Matt's sister's birthday party (and mine too, except I wasn't feeling well and had to stay home with Julia) and the boys had a blast having more cousin time. Monday, we went to a park in Hillsborough that we'd never gone too and the boys loved riding their motorcycles around the paved trails and especially on the bridges that went over a stream. Later on, we went to our pastor's house for a cookout, along with another family from church. The kids played well and the adult enjoyed talking and getting to know people better. We really need to have people over more often! I'm so bad about waiting to be invited but never wanting to initiate. And that was the weekend! Oh- and I ended up feeling better and got to have some birthday and open my gifts at home, all of which were great!!

For Daddy...

Go Wolfpack! Here's to the start of another football season...

This and That

The boys and I are sitting at the breakfast table. Julia is over on the floor playing with this toys that has a steering wheel and makes a lot of car sounds like engine revving, tires squealing, etc. A minute ago she was going to town on that toy and it was really funny. We were all laughing at the noises until I made a little joke. I said, "Nobody let her behind the wheel of a real car! She would be one dangerous driver!" The boys stopped laughing and just looked at me with solemn expressions. They just don't GET jokes! I told them I was just kidding and then they burst out laughing. So funny how sarcasm is lost on kids!

Miss Julia has made a turn for the better on her sleeping. In the last week I think she has gone from 6 or 7pm till I feed her at 4 or 5 (and then back to sleep till 7) or has slept straight through till 6:30 or 7. I am amazed and really surprised that she's done this on her own. Who knows if it will last. She is crawling all over the place and is still SOO attached to me. Unless I have *just* put her down to play and she's in a good mood, I can't walk past her without picking her up or she'll cry like her heart is breaking. And if she's sleepy, forget anyone else holding her...guess she only wants Mommy to experience her crankiness!

Gray has neared the end of his one month of hand-taping and is doing well I think. He's gotten a sticker for almost every nap and nighttime and the other day I let him pick out a car for his end of the month prize, only I'm making him work hard for it at the end. Yesterday he put his shoe in his mouth (happens all the time), ate the strap on my purse, and licked the shopping cart, so each time I told him he had to take a sticker off his calendar. I think since ending the thumb sucking, he is doing even more of putting yuck stuff in his mouth, so trying to end that too. So now he has to fill in the missing spaces on his calendar, which may take awhile at the rate he's going. And oh my has he gotten sassy! He thinks he knows it ALL! He regularly has arguments with me about things like how you say volleyball ("No Mommy, you're wrong! You say bolley ball"), what a yellow light means ("No Mommy, yellow does not mean get ready to stop, it means slow down. I know what it means!"), etc. And throwing fits when he doesn't want to do something has resurfaced too. I think for Joshua those came in waves till he was 4, so hopefully just 6 more months of that! He had a fit when we got to church last week and then when it was time to go, he sat down on the floor and pitched one then too. Fun stuff! He's been thinking about Jesus a lot though and I love his little comments like, "Daddy, even if you were in a fire, Jesus could save you...he could!" and "Joshua, Jesus wants you to do your best, even on a puzzle." and "Mommy, when it's dark I don't have to be afraid because Jesus will watch out for me." The other day in "preschool", I thought I try teaching him to write his name, and then I regretted that choice as soon as I started. He seemed pretty hopelessly unready and i was just about to quit (as opposed to continue and have to pull my hair out!), when he suddenly wrote a perfect G! Now he loves to write G everywhere and can write it just as well as Joshua. Maybe teaching him isn't going to be as tough as I thought. I think he just learns differently than Joshua.

Speaking of Joshua, he has been really into practicing his letters and he does really well with writing. The progress he has made without my help has made me want to take things casually with school. He is still such a little engineer and builds and creates stuff all the time. Lately he has been super into the marble racing set and he and Matt spent an intense naptime conducting a marble tournament. Joshua is so easy to be with as long as Gray isn't around and he will help us do whatever we're doing or play games with us or play with Julia, which he does a lot and is really sweet. I can see him learning a lot of life lessons, but not being able to quite apply them yet. It's nice to know he's listening to me and understanding though. He loves hanging out with Matt now and gone are the days when he refuses to leave my side.

Last thing- we're continuing to add new clients in the gym every week, thank the Lord! Matt counted about 31 people that come work out, if you count non-payers like me. We only had about 6 or 7 before the move, so things are really picking up. We are so thankful! Well I better go take care of the kids and house now. Have a good Wednesday!