Gray's Birthday

Gray had two family parties--the weekend before and after his actual birthday, so his real birthday was kind of low key.  Here are the highlights:

Gray got to pick his breakfast menu.  He chose cereal (which we never have anymore!), eggs, and sausage.  

 He got to open one of his presents from us, which was some Buzz Lightyear stuff I got at a yard sale last summer.  Then we headed to take Joshua to school and go to Bible Study.  He had fun playing with the other kids all morning.

 He got to pick his lunch menu:  peanut butter and jelly sandwich (which we also never have) and he got to open the other present from us:  a star wars vehicle with a few characters.  He loved this.

 During lunch I read him his annual birthday letter, which he liked for a few minutes and then got tired of listening to, and looked at his scrapbook.  He got a few birthday hugs and watched a movie of his choice:  Cars 2.

He got to pick his supper menu:  fish sticks and peas.  Then we had soccer practice and finished the night with a game of UNO.  Think he enjoyed his day!

Quote #3- One Thousand Gifts

"Life change comes when we receive life with thanks and ask for nothing to change."

Quote #2 One Thousand Gifts

"This act of naming grace moments, this list of God's gifts, moves beyond the shopping list variety of prayer and into the other side.  The other side of prayer, the interior of His throne room, the inner walls of His powerful, love-beating heart.

The list [of one thousand gifts] is God's list, the pulse of His love- the love that thrums on the other side of our prayers.

And I see it now for what this really is, this dare to write down one thousand things I love.  It really is a dare to name all the ways that God loves me.

The true Love Dare.  To move into His presence and listen to His love unending and know the grace uncontainable.  This is the vault of miracles.  The only thing that can change us, the world, is this--all His love."

**I loved this revelation--that all the little things that are our favorites or make us smile are really ways that God shows he loves us.  It's all from him and he delights in us enjoying his gifts.

Best of Gray: Part Two

1/4/10:  When Joshua was pretending they were being chased by dinosaurs, Gray said, "Don't you know the dinosaurs all died on the cross?"  The other day while not cleaning up like I told him to, I found him playing and singing "Children obey your parents."

1/29/10:  The other day I asked Gray if he turned out a light and he said, "Yes and I don't want you to look."  This meant no.  He did the same thing when I asked if he ate all his food, pooped in the potty, etc.

4/26/10:  Gray ate peas that he had dropped in the potty while peeing.

5/2/10:  Gray asked if my legs were in the wrong hole when I was wearing a skirt.

5/8/10:  Last night Gray peed in the potty and then put his head in just for fun.

5/29/10:  Gray wanted me to wipe him and said, "Can you do it like Daddy doos it?"  I asked how and he said, "He doos it like he doos it!"

6/7/10:  "Mommy, how about you put vaseline on my teeth so that when I throw up they won't get diarrhea on them?"  Me:  I don't think that will work.  Gray:  "Come on, let's try it!"

6/24/10:  "Mommy I love Sawyer more than Julia and I love Julia more than Sawyer...because Sawyer has a bigger face than Julia."

7/29/10:  me:  If you could be one of the 7 dwarves, which one would you be?  Gray:  "The Witch!"

8/11/10:  G: Mommy, what's a mare?  Me:  A mayor is in charge of a town.  G:  Well then what's a nightmare?

8/20/10:  "Dear God, please help Mimi and GrandGene to have a baby."

8/21/10:  "Daddy, even if you were in a fire, Jesus could save you--he could."

9/9/10:  "Julia may not have that tennis racket because she will get choked on it!"  "Julia likes that toy because she can put her gums inside of it."

10/7/10:  "Mommy my name is Very Scared Superman.  But I"m going to be brave for now because I know there's nothing to be afraid of."

10/16/10:  Today Gray peed into the tire swing and tore up a book, put the cover in the potty, and pooped on it.

11/10/10:  (looking in the sky) "I see an airplane...or a jet...or a jetski!"  Later that day:  "The reason my seat is wet is because my pants are getting it wet.  When I was going potty at Miss Carla's house, the stuff I was going potty with got me wet."

12/20/10:  "Joshua, from now on, we should never do the wrong thing."

1/10/11:  Gray is up to his old antics.  In the last week or 2, he dropped part of his pjs in the potty after peeing in there and put them back on anyway.  He also made Julia cray and wouldn't admit it, but finally said, "I carefully moved this hook into her."  He called me to wipe him and there was poop on the roll of toilet paper.  He wouldn't admit that it was from his hand but I insisted he wash them anyway.  He then held up a finger and said, "Just wash this one."

3/13/11:  When I asked Gray to help me unload the car, he scowled at me and pointed at me and said, "I TOLD you I was tired!"

3/22/11:  "Mommy, Joshua and I are finding worms and I brought mine inside."  (Me:  No worms inside.)  "Well it doesn't even have dirt on it!"

4/1/11:  "When I'm all grown up and Joshua's not grown up, I can drive the car and truck with Joshua in his booster seat and take him to special breakfast!"

5/13/11:  Stood up at breakfast and had no bottoms on and wrapped his lettuce (leftover from supper) around his penis and thought it was so funny.  Iasked him why he did that and he said, "I didn't know."

8/9/11:  Gray is so funny and random.  Today at supper I was talking to the boys about taking care of Julia and setting a good example.  It was quiet and then Gray cheerfully said, "I hope I don't die today!"

8/31/11:  I asked the boys what was the best way to make a friend and G said, "Find someone who has a big scratch...from a cougar."  Later we were talkng about outer space and he said, "If I live to be 13 years old, I will want to learn how to become an astronaut."

9/17/11:  Still says "hood" as in "I hood behind the couch."

12/11/11:  Gray finally learned to buckle himself this week.  He tends to struggle with working hard at anything and wants to give up quickly.  He has been absorbed in legos lately and will play quietly alone for a long time.  Today was the first time I've seen him try to read on his own initiative.  He still cries pretty easily and doesn't vocalize his feeling when he is hurt.  He loves calling people names, like today he's called me "Miss Pretty Pants" and 3 or 4 other similar names.  He enjoys working the words "poop", "potty", and "bottom" into conversation.  He does really well in his Sunday School class and still can't wait for kindergarten.  He loves numbers, especially 152.  He is still so generous and if Joshua complains about sharing an animal, he'll give it back or give him one of his.  Or if Joshua complains about him sitting in a certain chair, he'll say he changes his mind and move.

3/8/12:  Covered his eyelids in gum today.  Said, "I thought I wouldn't be able to see."

3/26/12:  I told Gray he was born early in the morning, even before Daddy gets up.  He said, "But I wouldn't even know what to do if I was born and you weren't awake yet."

Love you and all your antics, Gray!  You add so much fun, love, and life to our family!  Happy Birthday!

Best of Gray: Part One

 Gray is 5 tomorrow and I thought in his honor, I'd highlight some of his best (or funniest) moments of the last 5 years.  He has some good ones, but a warning:  some may not be for the faint of stomach.

I record milestones and memories in a little notebook for each of the kids, so here are some of the entries:

3/6/08- Gray touched Joshua's poop in the potty.

4/4/08- (Matt is on R&R from Iraq and Gray was 7 months old when he last saw him)- Gray is really taking well to Matt and loves to kiss him!

May 08- first real sentence:  "Bye Bye GrandGene."

8/3/08- Our favorite Gray words:  'momohycoh' (motorcycle), 'payganna' (playground), 'dysanana' (dinosaur), 'good book' (says this about all his favs), 'hee-oh' (cereal), 'bahwee' (belly), 'nunny night night' (another blanket)

8/17/08- knows most shapes and some colors ....I had to throw this in there because he was not even 17 months!  I know you're not supposed to compare, but poor Julia is 27 months and doesn't know shapes and only recently learned her second color-blue.  We had pink for awhile;)

 10/6/08- He loves to hug and kiss and play little games; he loves people and does well in nurseries and with new people.  Funny Gray sayings:  "Make a wolf" (wants to hear State music box), "Hope he's nice, hope he's nice" (imitating train book), "Dear God Amen" (when I say time to pray), "kicka mommy...mommy spankin you."

12/6/08- Gray is such a snuggle bug.  I went in his roomtime the other day and he wasn't playing with any toys, but just sitting in a pile of night-nights sucking his thumb.  I also walked in a room one time to find him planting kisses on his army bear.

1/13/09- Gray's most common phrase these days:  "I don't wike dat!"

2/10/09- (talking about getting ready to leave)  "May I bring my feet?"

2/20/09- Gray's pretty friendly with people and only needs a few minutes to warm up and sitting on their laps!  quote today:  "Can you hold me Josheeah?"

4/8/09- Matt:  "Do you have any questions about what we read?"  Gray:  "Huh.  I have so many questions!"

4/28/09:  "I saw a monstah makin noise, but it was weally a cah."- He says this at least once a day at random times.

6/10/09:  Me:  "Did you go poop poop?"  G:  "No!"  Me:  "Well why is there poop on your bottom?"  G:  "Because I wanted some milk."

later that day:  Me:  "Why is your shirt wet?"  G (wearing batman shirt):  "Because I did not want to be Pider Man."

6/28/09:  Gray to Mimi in the shower:  "What are those?"  Mimi:  "Breasts."  Gray:  "May I weh (wear) them?"

7/2/09:  Today Gray fell asleep with his mouth around the crib rail.

7/5/09:  "I need a fermote for this wite heeah."  (for the bathroom scale); later that day "The thunder bugs are out!"  (lightning bugs)

7/26/09:  At the beach, Gray slept in a playpen.  The first day that I put him down for a nap, I check on him.  He was standing in the middle of the room with a coonskin hat and my pink shoes on, banging on Matt's water bottle.  He stared at me for a minute, and then said, "I falled out."

8/5/09:  "I hurt me on Joshua's little teeny teeny tiny little wed (red) bacuum."  (the golf bag)

9/28/09:  "Mommy, when you die, me and Joshua won't have a Mommy and we will be sad.  We will cry."

10/20/09:  "I'm hungry for sand."

12/7/09:  Gray was licking hand sanitizer and telling me, "It's yummy!" the other night.  he thinks Santa Claus is called "Santa Closet."

Quote #1- One Thousand Gifts

The book I read second most recently was One Thousand Gifts, which has been pretty popular over the last year or so.  This book is about what one woman learned when she began to choose thankfulness in all things.

"I only deepen the wound of the world when I neglect to give thanks...for all the good things that a good God gives.  Why would the world need more anger, more outrage?  Rejecting joy to stand in solidarity with the suffering doesn't rescue the suffering.  The converse does.

The brave who focus on all things good and all thinkings beautiful and all things true, even in the small, who give thanks for it and discover joy even in the here and now, they are the change agents who bring fullest Light to all the world."

Happy Birthday Boys!

On Sunday, we celebrated Matt and Gray's birthdays with Matt's side of the family at his parents' house.  Matt really wanted it to be all about Gray, so it was a superhero theme, with a Spiderman cake and a little relay race/obstacle course that involved dressing up, crawling under a "spider web", retrieving a super hero/villain, and getting him back to the team in a little car.  It sounds more fun that it actually was...things just go by so fast after all the thought and preparation that goes into them!

Gray had a great time play with his cousins, eating cake, and opening presents.  Now for more celebrations!  Today was Matt's actual birthday so we gave him a few presents and he and I had an afternoon out without the kids.  Thursday we'll have to squeeze in something special for Gray between Bible Study and soccer, both of which he enjoys anyway.  Then we have party #2 with my fam coming soon!

Quote #4- When Helping Hurts

"North American Christians need to overcome the materialism of Western culture and see poverty in more relational terms.  We must also change our god-complexes by understanding our brokenness and embracing the message of the cross in deep and profound ways.  And as we do this, God can use us to change the poor's feelings of inferiority.  By showing low income people through our words, our actions, and our ears that they are people with unique gifts and abilities, we can be part of helping them to recover their sense of dignity, even as we recover from our sense of pride."

"Our perspective should be less about how we are going to fix the materially poor and more about how we can walk together, asking God to fix both of us."

Quote #3- When Helping Hurts

"Every minute since the fall, each human being is the proverbial 'square peg in a round hole.'  We don't fit right, because we were shaped for something else....Until we embrace our mutual brokenness, our work with low-income people is likely to do far more harm than good."

"Instead of seeing themselves as being created in the image of God, low income people often feel they are inferior to others.  This can paralyze the poor from taking initiative and from seizing opportunities to improve their situation, thereby locking them into material poverty.  But the economically rick often have "god- complexes."  One of the biggest problems in many poverty-alleviation efforts is that their design and implementation exacerbates the poverty of being of the rich- their god-complexes- and the poverty of being of the poor- their feelings of inferiority and shame."

You only wish...

...your hair looked this good in the morning:)  And these pictures don't even quite capture all the wildness that is Julia's hair these days.

PS Go Pack!

Quote #2- When Helping Hurts

"Poverty is rooted in broken relationships, so the solution to poverty is rooted in the power of Jesus' death and resurrection to put all things into right relationship again."

"Poverty alleviation is the ministry of reconciliation:  moving people closer to glorifying God by living in right relationship with God, with self, with others, and with the rest of creation."

Quote of the Day

I've read so many good books over the last couple of months...nonfiction too, which is usually not my thing!  Wanted to share some of the parts of these books that I've written down so I can read over again.  Will post one at a time so it's not too boring!!

Just finished the book When Helping Hurts, which my pastor gave me to read in light of the Kids Night Out ministry we're getting going.  This book is a bit radical in that it critiques as non-helpful many of the typical efforts made to help the poor, such as the short-term mission trip, food banks, benevolent funds, etc.

The goal of the book is to alter these typical methods of alleviating poverty into programs that will actually bring lasting change to poor families, which usually involves building relationships with them and helping them to help themselves.

first quote:
"North American Christians are simply not doing enough.  We are the richest people to ever walk the face of the earth, yet most of us live as though there is nothing terribly wrong in the world.  We attend our kids' soccer game, pursue our careers, and take beach vacations while 40% of the world's inhabitants struggle just to eat every day....We do not necessarily need to feel guilty about our wealth.  But we do need to get up every morning with a deep sense that something is terribly wrong with the world and yearn and strive to do something about it.  There is simply not enough yearning and striving going on."

Gooaaalll!

Soccer season is here and we had our first practice on Thursday!  The tough thing this year is that the soccer association is having a lot of technical difficulties so we've yet to get a game schedule, though they start next weekend, and when we showed up for practice, Joshua's team only had 5 kids there and no coach.  We think one of the dads has now volunteered to coach, but he seemed a bit iffy.  Hoping it ends up to be a good season anyway.

Gray's coach is super into it and did a great job.  Gray had a good time and is excited to be on his own team this year.  And those cheeks jiggling when he runs are still just so cute:)

 Joshua's team practiced with another team while we figured out the coaching stuff and I was amazed at his social growth since last year.  He was participating, talking to the other kids, still not outgoing, but he did everything he asked and I didn't see any of the weird behavior he displayed the last two years when he was so shy and inhibited about playing.  Yay for school on that growth!

Julia meanwhile wasn't too thrilled to be there.  She didn't find her brothers very fun to watch, really wanted to hang out on the playground instead, and peed on the soccer field.  She had also peed in the high chair at Chili's right before the game.  Yes, somehow we have regressed quite a bit in the potty training since I came back from WV.  I remember Joshua being the same way so I think that is all just part of it, especially when you start at 2.

Anyway, looking forward to seeing the boys take the soccer field by storm next Saturday!

Going for it

We mailed in our acceptance letter to the charter school.  We told the boys today.  Gray is fine with it, but he tends to have a pretty laid back response to this sort of thing anyway.  Joshua was happy to go to Hillandale again next year and wasn't so happy about the prospect of changing schools for 2nd grade....that is until Matt mentioned about the "enrichments" at the charter school.

Every Monday the kids get out a half day but can stay and do special classes (that you pay for), like CrossFit Kids that Matt teaches.  Matt happened to also mentioned there was a fencing, a.k.a. sword fighting enrichment class and Joshua was practically giddy about that!  So think he can be won over should we end up having both of them at Voyager.

So this was never what I thought we would do.  I remember saying that our kids didn't need any kind of special school with a bunch of uppity kids... Ha.  Guess once again I am eating my words. I guess my main issue is just not wanting to act as if we are better than all the other families that go to whatever school they are assigned...as if our kids are so special that we need the best of everything.  We did take a 2 minutes step to sign up for the school online, but other than that, we were just chosen by the computer, something that could happen to anyone.  So as Matt reminds me, we are just taking the opportunity that was provided to us just as anyone else could do.  And most of all, I prayed not for a particular outcome, but for us to know what is best and this is the choice that seemed right.

Excited to watch both of my boys grow and blossom in their own way next year!  And praying for growth, not stress, as I figure out how to balance involvement in both their lives, plus all the other areas of responsibility.

Better Homes and Gardens?

Not quite, but we are trying some vegetables this year!  We've spent the last couple of days preparing a vegetable garden and have planted carrots, peas, onions, cabbage, spinach, and lettuce.  Still come in the next couple of months are tomatoes and peppers (which we've started inside) and zucchini, cucumbers, sunflowers, and marigolds.  The flowers are supposedly good companion plants for some of the vegetables.

Then I also got some gladiola bulbs planted with a little help from my friend (who likes to work in about 5 minute increments and then take long breaks...and also had me scouring the grass for the tiny tomato seeds which he just felt like dumping out).  I have a few more flower seeds to plant later.  We also could use some bushes in the front to cover the foundation.  We have one dead plant on one side and one half-dead plant on the other.  But we decided food was more of a priority so vegetables first, prettying up the yard later.  We did get a bunch of mulch put out though.

Forgive the pictures.  I was in my bathrobe and sent Gray out to take some in this is what I got.

Decisions, Decisions

Some of you know that we entered our boys in the lottery...the public charter school lottery, that is.  There's a great newer school that just added K through 2nd grade for the Fall that seems to be one of the most highly sought after free schools in Durham.  Matt has a connection with the principal's family and also teaches kids' CrossFit classes there, so he knows a little bit about the school from his experiences.

So there were over 600 kids to enter the lottery just on the first couple of days so I had no expectation of us "winning."  And Hillandale has been fine.  I think school in general has been good for Joshua.  We have had our disappointments with his specific situation there from time to time, but overall it's going fine.

BUT I do think that the charter school would be better educationally.  Joshua hasn't really been challenged and I don't even know if any of his teachers (including the gifted class teacher because we've never even heard from her) knows what Joshua is capable of.  The communication pretty much stinks and from my times of going in the class, it seems like a ton of busy work.  At the charter school, the boys would be there until they graduate, all the teachers would know them due to the small size, and because charter schools have more freedom, there's no keeping teachers around that aren't good.

BUT I do love the diversity there, which isn't going to be the case at the charter school, even though it's public.  And we are getting very familiar with Hillandale and Joshua knows so many kids there--even ones in other classes or other grades.  I have heard there are some really good teachers and I would hope that he would be more challenged as he gets older.  And we've heard Hillandale is going to have a middle school soon, so they'd stay there for almost their whole school career.  At the charter school, there's the risk of being with many kids who have everything (stuff-wise, I mean) and fuel the flame of materialism in Joshua that we are trying to keep at bay.

BUT kids that have everything and kids that don't are both in need of Jesus and there would be lessons to be learned from being around both types of kids.

And so, here's the dilemma:  Gray was accepted, but Joshua is 100-something on the waitlist.

According to the rules, next year at this time, if Gray were a student, Joshua (as his sibling) would have the first opportunity for a spot in the 2nd grade and if there were more 2nd grade siblings than spots available, there would be a lottery just among the siblings.  I have no idea what the chances are of him getting in.

But to take that chance, we'd have to send our boys to two different schools for the whole school year.  Do we really want the headache of two different schedules?  Do we want Joshua to get even more attached to Hillandale, making closer friends as a 1st grader, and then taking him out?  And I guess there's also the option of homeschooling him a year so that we don't have to worry about any of that, but is that just as disruptive?

So, decisions, decisions.  We have to decide by the 23rd.  Pray we'd be wise!

New "Do"

Julia got into the Vaseline today.

Here's her interview on this great new style:

http://youtu.be/kN2zh-r5uKI

Wow-ing me

Every morning on the way to school, the kids and I pray out loud.  I fail so many times at home to follow through with devotion plans and Bible memory verses, but when we're in the car, there's no where for anyone to go and nothing for anyone to do, so it works.

I usually suggest something we focus on that morning and I'll get maybe one sentence prayers from the boys, while I go a little longer, though I know they don't pay attention.  At least that's what I thought.

This morning we were talking about Easter and why we need Jesus.  We all found plenty of things to tell God about from just the hour and a half that we'd been awake that day that demonstrated how we cannot be perfect on our own.  I then kept praying about our need for a Savior and our thankfulness that one day we'll be made like Jesus in heaven.

Sometimes things don't come out quite right when I pray out loud and in this case, I said something like, "Thank you that you'll make us like Jesus again in heaven."  In my mind I thought, "Well not really again, except in the sense of people as a whole being made what God intended them to be like Adam and Eve at first."  But I didn't say that out loud.  Gray had been poking Julia and chattering away while I prayed and Joshua is usually just ready to get it over with so he can get back to reading or playing cards or whatever he likes to do in the car.

But I finished praying and there came a voice from the back seat.

(Joshua) "Mommy, we weren't ever like Jesus."

Wow.  He was listening and he understands and cares enough to talk about it to me.  Or maybe he just loves to correct people, but still!  He gets it.  I explained what I meant and he agreed, but just to be sure I got it, said again.  "yeah, cause we weren't ever like him."

When I was a teenager in church there was a time of silence to confess sins.  I distinctly remember coming up with something to daydream about during that time--probably a boy--because in my mind, I had nothing to confess.  Seriously.  I did not get that I sinned every hour of every day and needed a Savior.

My 6 year old gets that.  So thankful that God is at work in him despite my shortcomings!

And in other "wow" news, Gray was chewing bubble gum this afternoon and covered his eyelids with it.  When asked why, he said, "I thought I wouldn't be able to see."  Wow.

Wild and Wonderful

You decide who is who:)

 Kisses from big brother

 Sweet sad face

 Is it just me or does he look familiar?  Or do all newborns look alike?

Maddox loves Mommy 

 Because one vehicle is never enough

 "I'm A- OK!"

 Taking some time to ponder life.

 Love those cheeks!

Snuggle time

Just kidding!  Sawyer is both wild and wonderful, actually, and Maddox is just precious.  So enjoyed getting to be with the Moores the last few days.  That Sawyer is something else.  He would tell me, "Come on, Aunt Holly, let's go!" and want me to come play with him.  He is the happiest little guy.  The simplest things make him laugh so hard and oh, that laugh is so great!  Little Maddox was doing great, sleeping a lot but becoming more alert.  He didn't cry much at all and Jeannie and Hunter were so calm, easily figuring out his needs.  Experts now!

I definitely missed my little family, but I don't know how they felt.  Joshua said he missed me, but when I came to get him, he was so absorbed in playing a video game at Nanny and Pa's that he barely said hi.  Same for Gray, and this is how one conversation went tonight:
Me:  Did you miss me?
Gray:  No I didn't.  I told Nanny I didn't.
Me:  Not even a little bit?
Gray:  No.
Me:  Did you even think about me?
Gray:  Yes...no. I mean I just thought about what Jeannie's house looked like- what color it was- one time.

Thanks for the love, Gray.

Now my Julia really did give me lots of love.  She ran up to me and kept saying, "Mommy, Mommy!" and snuggling up to me.  Love that sweet girl.

Big thanks to Nanny and Pa and Matt for holding down the fort for me!